Did he really just ask me that?

So I have been out on a few dates with this one guy, and feel things are going really well, until last night, where I had to ask myself, did he really just ask me that?

I enjoy red wine to white, and would love a beer over anything fruity.

I am an adventurous eater, choosing red meat over anything vegetarian. I'll eat oysters and octopus am not freaked out if its raw. I would rarely order chicken in a restaurant, especially if there are more exciting options.

I'm not about stilettos, enjoying my flats more. I'd wear a hoodie all the time if I could, feeling comfortable enough in myself not to have to dress it up. I'm casual and natural and am really proud to be.

I take the bus. I'll walk or take a subway over a cab, I mean why not? I'm in this great city with incredible public transportation, why waste my money on a crazy cab if I don't have to.

I don't like puppies or cuddly animals (unless its my teddy bear), preferring fish or turtles if there was an option for a pet in my life.

I'm not at the point of talking/thinking about my 2.8 children. I don't have names picked out and don't day dream about how fun it will be to be a mommy.

I don't fantasize about my dream wedding (been there, done that). I would love nothing more, if I ever get to that point again, to escape to a remote, exotic, and crazy sexy location, and come back with a new ring.

With all of this discussed or assumed by my date over the past few encounters, I get the following query... "Do you have a vagina?"

FYI... I am not a jappy Long Island girl and feel that. To quote my date, "Your are like a chill guy." Shouldn't this be a selling point? For real - did he really just ask me that?

The Stutterer

The more dates I go on, the more interesting it gets. I started emailing with this one guy, seemed nice, just moved to the city after getting his MBA. We had a lot in common and demonstrated quite the interest in me, asking me for drinks right off the bat, which is unusual as previously discussed. We set a date and he picks a cute little Italian restaurant by my apartment. As I walk in, I am looking forward to what could be a nice date.

And there is starts... I hate to be mean about this, but it was so completely distracting! At first I thought maybe he's just nervous, but as time passes, I realize that this is a legitimate stutter.

Needless to say there was not enough wine in the place to make this comfortable and the night just drags. At least that was my opinion. Apparently, the stutterer just did not want things to end, even asking if, as the bottle ran dry and the food was taken off the table, we can keep talking, as he is just enjoying my company so much! I indulge him a little further until I can't take it any more. I look at the time, and politely excuse myself for the "early meeting" I have set for the next day.

We walk out of the restaurant and the stutterer tries to verbalize how much fun he had and we have to do this again soon. Absolutely! I say, let's do that...

Needless to say there will be no date two. In the words of my favorite childhood cartoon - "Th-th-th-that's all folks!"

The Valentine's Day Freak Out!

No, its not my freak out, Valentine's Day doesn't really bother me, its the freak out that is witnessed amongst single men in New York City. It's actually really interesting to see these single guys sweat. God forbid a single guy initiate any conversation or contact on around Valentine's Day, its like the potential dating world goes dark for a few days, or adds all types of caveats, alerting the single girl that "this has nothing to do with Valentine's Day."

For example, as I am leaving the gym on Sunday morning, also known as Valentine's Day, I get a message from this guy I have been out with a few times. I haven't heard from him in a while, but he surfaces to ask me to lunch, stating he is in the neighborhood, but this has NOTHING to do with Valentine's Day.

Seriously dude! One, I don't care. Two, I haven't heard from you beyond emails in over a month. And three, you could show up at my door with a dozen roses, and Valentine's Day or not, it still wouldn't make a difference, but thanks for the clarification.

That was fun! And the end of another hopeless single man in New York...

The Evolution of Asking Someone Out...

Remember when things were a little more simple? As kids, if a boy liked you, he'd ask you to play, or share his pudding pack with you. It was simple, but you knew. Then, when you got to the teenage years, it was all about asking you to dance at the school dance. That was serious stuff. Then there was, "Hey, you want to go to the movies? My Mom will drive." For me, college was not about formalized dating, which brings us to present day... As an adult, heading towards thirty, I have these beliefs of how someone should ask you out. For example, "Hey, let's set something up for later this week" or "we should meet for a drink sometime". They can even go so far as "I would love to take you to dinner."

When talking with this one guy, trying to find a time to meet up, I suggest later this week and get the following in response...

"That works, or you can come by and watch me lift weights and cook stir fry ;)"

Was he asking me out there? Seriously? I would take the shared pudding pack over that offer. What makes this simple question so challenging for some?

A String of First Dates and One Night Stands

The glamorous life of a single girl in New York City. Its fun! Going on dates, having drinks, and cute boys? I mean, really, there isn't too much to complain about... Nevertheless, I'm starting to believe that this isn't going to be all that entertaining for much longer.

The first date. It's an exciting thing! You meet someone, have witty banter, exchange information, and a date is set. You go out (hopefully someplace fun), have drinks (a lot if the date is bad), and wonder what happens next. Not sure if there should be a second date but feeling as though you should give it a try...but the call doesn't come. Ah well, time to start all over again. After a bit, it loses its luster and gets harder to keep from feeling rejected. This is a big city after all, there are plenty of other fish in the sea. Blah, blah, blah... Is it just me or does the sea seem to be getting smaller and smaller.

The one night stand. Usually fueled by one too many glasses of wine, margaritas, or even more destructive - shots! Similar to the first date - without the actual date. You meet someone and have witty banter. There is no exchange of information prior, far too many drinks, whispers from your friends and you leave the bar. This is my favorite, like a movie or something, kissing on the streets filled with presumed passion and the thought (or at least my thought), "wow, this is so great, I bet this will totally work out." I know, I'm a hopeless romantic (who really needs to cut back on the cheesy movies). As the morning sun gleams in, with a dry mouth and smudged make-up, its back to reality, coupled with a wicked hang over. Numbers may be exchanged, pleasantries - "this was a lot of fun, I'll call you." Uh huh...yea.

Glamorous. Really. Don't get me wrong, I'm having fun and have no regrets. I'm not on the market for that next husband, but would love to string something better together.

Wisdom From a 6 Year Old

So my 6 year old niece is beyond profound, providing me with some of the most succinct love advice with a healthy dash of sarcasm. Its a little ridiculous, but I'd like to believe that her insight is just pure enough to be helpful in leading me to something more.

Upon my last break-up, my older sister was doing what she does best, telling me how everything will be okay, "there are a million of guys in New York City...". In the background, my niece is giving her input, letting my sister and I both know that "there are only 78 boys there for Auntie Molly." Wow, only 78? That's not a very big swimming pool! I ask her to engage in her soothsayer abilities and give me more insight. She informs me that the boy that is right for me will be named Jacob. Interesting...

Most recently, my niece is telling me of her upcoming Father-Daughter dance, I ask her if she will be dancing with any other boys besides her Daddy. In pure 6 year old going on 16 year old fashion, she tells me that she isn't too sure. She goes on to let me know that she has a few boyfriends, and "do you have a boyfriend yet Auntie Molly?"

Nothing like a little humiliation by a 6 year old. I let her know that I do not in fact have a boyfriend, and ask for her advice once again. Seeing as she is the one with all the luck, what are her secrets? She of course, being a little stinker, will not let me in on her secrets. I begin to beg, needing to know the secrets from the playground, maybe there is something I am over looking with my approach? She won't budge! Pulling out all the stops, I ask her how she expects to be a flower girl ever again if she can't help me find a man? Her response...

"That's just life!"