I visited my Poppa while I was home for the weekend. He's 93 years old and has become quite the conversationalist, throwing out interesting stories (he won the award for resident most like Cary Grant) and funny jokes.
As he is telling me how proud he is of me and how interested he is in my life, he asks, with a smirk on his face, if I am keeping any secrets from him. I have a feeling I know where he is going with this, but ask him whatever could he mean? He looks over at my sister than back at me.
"Well Molly, do you have any special companion?" Stifling my laughs, I let him know that sadly, I do not have a boyfriend. I assure him, however, that I will keep him posted. He then asks me if I am on Jdate. How does a 93 year old man with no computer literacy know about Jdate?
Gotta love him and his desire to see me settled and happy, hopefully, in his mind, with a nice Jewish man. In my greatest Jewish grandmother voice I say...
"From your mouth to God's ears!"
Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
What constitutes a date?
A date to me is when two people who like each other go out together. Dinner, movie, drinks, concert, museum, whatever... Does an outing need to end with two people in bed together to constitute a date?
Well according to my ex, that I have recently re-connected with, that should be a part of the plan. After a perfect dinner and evening stroll, I thanked him for what I thought was a great evening, and a great date. He questioned whether it was a date or not, because I chose to go home alone. His exact words as I hopped on the uptown express bus - can it be considered a date if we're going home separately?
Call it my naivete, but I'm wondering if this is what dating has been reduced to? Is this modern day courting? Perhaps I should just reconsider why I have reunited with this asshole in the first place!
Well according to my ex, that I have recently re-connected with, that should be a part of the plan. After a perfect dinner and evening stroll, I thanked him for what I thought was a great evening, and a great date. He questioned whether it was a date or not, because I chose to go home alone. His exact words as I hopped on the uptown express bus - can it be considered a date if we're going home separately?
Call it my naivete, but I'm wondering if this is what dating has been reduced to? Is this modern day courting? Perhaps I should just reconsider why I have reunited with this asshole in the first place!
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Slumber Party
My 7 year old niece is quite precocious. She is a sponge, grasping everything and anything that is said around her. And she is wise beyond her years. I love her for this, she truly is exceptional! However, the little stinker is really getting a little too cute for her own good.
She asked me a few times this weekend, how my slumber party was. I look at her, asking with great curiosity, what she means? I haven't had a slumber party in years! She told me that isn't true, she heard her mother (my sister) talking about a recent slumber party that I had. Thinking quickly and sending death looks my sister's way, I tell her that I slept over at my friend's house the prior weekend out of town.
This satisfied the sassy girl for only a moment, as she continued to pressure me for details. Lesson learned, tell my sister to keep her mouth shut around her chatty little girls and keep future slumber parties confidential!
She asked me a few times this weekend, how my slumber party was. I look at her, asking with great curiosity, what she means? I haven't had a slumber party in years! She told me that isn't true, she heard her mother (my sister) talking about a recent slumber party that I had. Thinking quickly and sending death looks my sister's way, I tell her that I slept over at my friend's house the prior weekend out of town.
This satisfied the sassy girl for only a moment, as she continued to pressure me for details. Lesson learned, tell my sister to keep her mouth shut around her chatty little girls and keep future slumber parties confidential!
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Propaganda
So there is this new show called Mad Love, it's on after How I Met Your Mother, and strangely, all the characters look the same. Anyway, it's total propaganda. Total bull shit that isn't even close to real, but gets people thinking that New York City is a land filled with relationship opportunity. They make it look easy and it's not. If you can't tell, I'm a little riled up by this.
The pilot starts atop the Empire State Building. Seriously, that is not a joke. An averaged sized, good looking man, who isn't a tourist, is up there with his best friend, and randomly runs into a beautiful girl, as he turns to look for his cell phone that was left on the ledge. That would never happen for so many reasons...
1. A phone wouldn't last left alone in this city for more than 2 seconds
2. Nobody's hair looks that good 38 stories up, this may not be the Windy City, but it gets windy on top of sky scrapers.
3. No straight American guy just hangs out at the top of tourist traps without a particular reason.
Their date continues, they talk all night, they have a romantic kiss. Blah, Blah, Blah. Propaganda!!!! Never would happen. What would happen is the following...
1. His girlfriend walks in after they share their first kiss and he offers to cook her breakfast (seriously???)
2. "He" (the cute, "oh my God he's the one guy") would be like the best friend instead - a big sloppy mess who needs to shave and likes burping, masturbation, and bad jokes
3. They realize this is all a dream and will never work out
I wish life was a simple as a 30 minute sitcom. I wish it was that easy, because I would keep lining up to get to the top of the Empire State Building. Life is what it is, and reality can bite sometimes. But I will continue to watch this propaganda (it really was a good show), and hope that my life will take this romantic and seemingly unrealistic turn for the better!
The pilot starts atop the Empire State Building. Seriously, that is not a joke. An averaged sized, good looking man, who isn't a tourist, is up there with his best friend, and randomly runs into a beautiful girl, as he turns to look for his cell phone that was left on the ledge. That would never happen for so many reasons...
1. A phone wouldn't last left alone in this city for more than 2 seconds
2. Nobody's hair looks that good 38 stories up, this may not be the Windy City, but it gets windy on top of sky scrapers.
3. No straight American guy just hangs out at the top of tourist traps without a particular reason.
Their date continues, they talk all night, they have a romantic kiss. Blah, Blah, Blah. Propaganda!!!! Never would happen. What would happen is the following...
1. His girlfriend walks in after they share their first kiss and he offers to cook her breakfast (seriously???)
2. "He" (the cute, "oh my God he's the one guy") would be like the best friend instead - a big sloppy mess who needs to shave and likes burping, masturbation, and bad jokes
3. They realize this is all a dream and will never work out
I wish life was a simple as a 30 minute sitcom. I wish it was that easy, because I would keep lining up to get to the top of the Empire State Building. Life is what it is, and reality can bite sometimes. But I will continue to watch this propaganda (it really was a good show), and hope that my life will take this romantic and seemingly unrealistic turn for the better!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
If you can't beat them, join them?
So my friend, who reads my blog (Thanks!), decided to send me this article from the Wall Street Journal. The gist of it is that "too many men in their 20s are living in a new kind of extended adolescence". My response to my friend and the article was - interesting and sad all in one concise article filled with excuses! Ugh! So frustrating!
Ah well. Gets me thinking though. If most men these days are are stuck in an extended adolescence and there is little getting around it - should I join them? Is it time to break out the funnel?
Right as I am ready to start practicing my best keg stand, I realized, I've have tested the can't beat them join them theory. It's called Africa, it's called dive bars with beer pong, its called 25 year old suitors.
Shit, seems I'm just going to have to stay the course. Maybe I can find a straggler, an outlier, someone who isn't focused on just beer pong and video games, and actually enjoys being a grown up.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704409004576146321725889448.html?KEYWORDS=where+have+the+good+men+gone
Ah well. Gets me thinking though. If most men these days are are stuck in an extended adolescence and there is little getting around it - should I join them? Is it time to break out the funnel?
Right as I am ready to start practicing my best keg stand, I realized, I've have tested the can't beat them join them theory. It's called Africa, it's called dive bars with beer pong, its called 25 year old suitors.
Shit, seems I'm just going to have to stay the course. Maybe I can find a straggler, an outlier, someone who isn't focused on just beer pong and video games, and actually enjoys being a grown up.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704409004576146321725889448.html?KEYWORDS=where+have+the+good+men+gone
Sunday, February 20, 2011
See what I deal with?
The continued question is how to meet a quality guy in New York City. So many times I'm out with girlfriends and have the same conversation over and over. Internet dating still feels like banging my head against the wall, but as usual, I'm a glutton for punishment. Below is the most recent messaging between me and a potential match as we discuss how hungover he is from a big night out last night...
mf314 says:
so, hungover?
JS91880 says:
yup
JS91880 says:
very'
mf314 says:
worth it?
JS91880 says:
wanna come rub my head?
Really??? As if that's not enough for me to stop the message right then and there, I maneuver the questioning towards jobs and other basic pleasantries. As the conversation falls to a close, I get...
JS91880 says:
ok, i gotta lie down...so unless u wanna come lie on the couch w me, I'll talk to u later? :)
mf314 says:
not making off my own couch tonight
mf314 says:
sorry
mf314 says:
I'll talk to you later
JS91880 says:
ha no problem
JS91880 says:
have a good nite :)
mf314 says:
you too
mf314 says:
feel better
Seriously? I just got propositioned on via Internet dating instant messaging without even a drink offer. Is this what it's coming down to? See what I have to deal with?
mf314 says:
so, hungover?
JS91880 says:
yup
JS91880 says:
very'
mf314 says:
worth it?
JS91880 says:
wanna come rub my head?
Really??? As if that's not enough for me to stop the message right then and there, I maneuver the questioning towards jobs and other basic pleasantries. As the conversation falls to a close, I get...
JS91880 says:
ok, i gotta lie down...so unless u wanna come lie on the couch w me, I'll talk to u later? :)
mf314 says:
not making off my own couch tonight
mf314 says:
sorry
mf314 says:
I'll talk to you later
JS91880 says:
ha no problem
JS91880 says:
have a good nite :)
mf314 says:
you too
mf314 says:
feel better
Seriously? I just got propositioned on via Internet dating instant messaging without even a drink offer. Is this what it's coming down to? See what I have to deal with?
Thursday, February 17, 2011
A Little Gratitude...
As much as I bitch about my single state, I have been reminded of how great I actually have it.
* I don't have to deal with husbands, in laws, or baby drama
* I can stay out all night because I got no one to answer to but me
* I can sleep with who ever I want, whenever I want, how ever many times I want
* I can get a mani/pedi whenever I want it, any time, any day, without having a care in the world
* I get peace and quiet whenever I choose and can find a party when I need something a little more exciting
I know there is always going to be a "grass is always greener" discussion going through my head and around the cocktail table with the girls. But for today, I see that I've got a pretty good life!
* I don't have to deal with husbands, in laws, or baby drama
* I can stay out all night because I got no one to answer to but me
* I can sleep with who ever I want, whenever I want, how ever many times I want
* I can get a mani/pedi whenever I want it, any time, any day, without having a care in the world
* I get peace and quiet whenever I choose and can find a party when I need something a little more exciting
I know there is always going to be a "grass is always greener" discussion going through my head and around the cocktail table with the girls. But for today, I see that I've got a pretty good life!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
And that's how decisions are made...
Prince Charming stayed in the picture a little longer than anticipated. I mean, he's so adorable! Against my better judgment, it was just hard to say no to him! As time passed however, it became crystal clear why things needed to end.
1. Telling me he has "nothing to give" . What the hell does that mean?
2. After asking me out, he recants, telling me "I just can't spend a lot, after my move, I'm not in the highest of finances right now." Its New York! You can go on a great date for free!
3. Ah, the move. He has since moved out of his childhood home with his father in Long Island and into a lofted studio in the middle of nowhere Brooklyn, where he and his brother have bunk beds (or the lofted version of such).
After not hearing from him in a week with the excuse of, "yea, been working a lot (he's a glorified waiter), that's my life." I'll make the decision easy. This is over, there is NOTHING to see here.
1. Telling me he has "nothing to give" . What the hell does that mean?
2. After asking me out, he recants, telling me "I just can't spend a lot, after my move, I'm not in the highest of finances right now." Its New York! You can go on a great date for free!
3. Ah, the move. He has since moved out of his childhood home with his father in Long Island and into a lofted studio in the middle of nowhere Brooklyn, where he and his brother have bunk beds (or the lofted version of such).
After not hearing from him in a week with the excuse of, "yea, been working a lot (he's a glorified waiter), that's my life." I'll make the decision easy. This is over, there is NOTHING to see here.
Monday, February 14, 2011
A metaphor? I hope not...
As I walked out of my apartment this Valentine's Day morning, I see a hearse. Now, I live next to a funeral home and often see caskets and mourning people as I leave my building.
Today, as I walked out to see the large black car with a casket in tow, I wondered, is this a metaphor for my love life, or as it turns, lack there of? I choose not to accept this coincidence. Instead, I pumped up the music on my ipod and strut down the street in my highest heels.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Today, as I walked out to see the large black car with a casket in tow, I wondered, is this a metaphor for my love life, or as it turns, lack there of? I choose not to accept this coincidence. Instead, I pumped up the music on my ipod and strut down the street in my highest heels.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Want to come to my dorm room and watch a movie?
Now that I have started a total love affair with Netflix (a long story for another time), I want to watch movies all the time! In an attempt to have a low key night with Prince Charming (yes, he's still around), I offered to have him over and watch the latest arrival from Netflix - The Social Network. Now, I hadn't seen the movie yet and was really looking forward to watching it.
Back in college, if you were asked to go back to the dorms and watch a movie, usually there was no movie watching going on. Silly me for thinking that I'm out of college. He comes over, brings a lovely bottle of wine, and tries right off the bat to distract me from the movie. I remind him that I really want to watch the movie, and shut him down. As we hit the halfway mark, he tells me "I've behaved for half the movie, I can't help myself anymore." I told him that I really wanted to watch the movie. He replies, "wait, you really wanted me to come over and watch the movie???" And with that, he paused the movie.
A sign that I am getting older. I was really upset that I stopped the movie, and found it hard to pick up where I left off in the movie the next day. Is it so hard to find a guy who wants to come over and actually watch the movie? Is two hours really all that challenging for a guy to sit still and focus on something? Hmmm....
Back in college, if you were asked to go back to the dorms and watch a movie, usually there was no movie watching going on. Silly me for thinking that I'm out of college. He comes over, brings a lovely bottle of wine, and tries right off the bat to distract me from the movie. I remind him that I really want to watch the movie, and shut him down. As we hit the halfway mark, he tells me "I've behaved for half the movie, I can't help myself anymore." I told him that I really wanted to watch the movie. He replies, "wait, you really wanted me to come over and watch the movie???" And with that, he paused the movie.
A sign that I am getting older. I was really upset that I stopped the movie, and found it hard to pick up where I left off in the movie the next day. Is it so hard to find a guy who wants to come over and actually watch the movie? Is two hours really all that challenging for a guy to sit still and focus on something? Hmmm....
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